Gallimaufry: Discovering God Scene

Lena lets out a cry of terror and Aaron cries in pain. Jaden runs forward and uses one shard of the mirror to see what he’s doing and the other to stab the beast. It screams and its attention is drawn away from Aaron. Lena grabs him and pulls him to his feet. They start running. Jaden starts to run with them, collecting some glass on his way.

When Jaden can no longer see the beasts in his mirror shard, the three stop for a quick rest close to Nerdfest. Lena examines Aaron’s wounds. He has teeth marks in his side, they are deep but not life threatening.

JADEN
Well at least we can now confirm that Doctor Phil is most likely the devil.
LENA
This isn’t time to be making jokes Jaden.
JADEN
I’m not joking, really. I was able to use the mirror to see the gallimaufry, and the only way you could do that is with the Mirror of Vanity crafted by the Devil himself.
AARON
That’s all fine and dandy, now that we can see ‘em. Now how do we kill ‘em?

Jaden takes out his phone and searches for a few minutes.

JADEN
It says that they can be killed by blades made and signed by God.

Lena stands up and walks into Nerdfest.

AARON
Hey where are you going?
LENA
We need blades with the word of god right?
JADEN
Yeah?
LENA
So, the only weapons we have that are signed, are signed by Stan Lee. Now who else can you imagine being God?

Aaron and Jaden exchange looks accusing her of being nuts.

LENA (CONT’D)
I know it sounds crazy, but what other choice do we have?
JADEN AND AARON
We could run.

Lena rolls her eyes.

LENA
These things will probably kill us when we get home. They don’t have a limit on where they go.

Both men sigh.

AARON
Alright, just let me sit for a minute.

Lena begins raiding through the different weapons signed by Stan Lee. She pulls out a KATANA, TWO SAIS, and a PAIR of CLAW GLOVES.

JADEN
Alright, Aaron you ready?
AARON
Are those Wolverine claws?
JADEN
Possibly, now take this and let’s go.
LENA
Way ahead of you boys.

Lena twirls the sai in her hands and starts walking. The boys get up and follow. Another growl from the beasts break through the air and the three gather back to back. They search with their mirror shards.

JADEN
It’s above!
LENA
There’s one coming straight for us.
AARON
Here comes that bastard that bit me.

A three on three battle begins. Glimpses can be seen through the mirrors as it goes on. Jaden stabs one through the heart and it falls over. It becomes visible with out the use of the mirror.

JADEN
Stab it in the heart!

Lena pulls back her arm and her blade connects with one of the Gallimaufry.
It falls before her feet dead.
Aaron thrusts his fist forward punching the claws into his opponents chest and it falls onto it’s back, dead.

AARON
How many more of these things are there?

He starts breathing heavily.

JADEN I saw three at the fashion stage.
AARON
I hope those are the only ones left.

They stay silent for a few moments, examining each other to see how badly they were wounded. 

LENA
Well you guys ready?
AARON
As ready as I can be, how about you Jaden?
JADEN
Same, let’s get this over with.

Earthian Studies: Perfect van scene

festival going on and the road was packed. I sighed and leaned back in my seat. Traffic was practically at a stand still and my radio is still broken, so I have nothing to really entertain myself with. I stuffed my face full with candy and decided to kill the time by watching people in the park. There was a bunch of young Earthlings chasing those flying fluffy things. I think their called ducks. From behind me I heard a siren. I looked up into my rearview mirror and saw flashing red and blue lights.

            “Pull over!”

            A loud voice crackled out of the car behind me and I sighed. I pulled my car off to the side of the road. And parked the van. I rolled down my window and waited for the cop to get to my window. I’ve become familiar with this. I wasn’t surprised when the officer was in fact Leonard. This will be the fifth time I’ve had a problem with this guy. I think he has some sort of crush on me, or something. 

            “Do you know why I pulled you over?” the semi-plump man asked leaning into my window.

            “No officer, why did you sir?” I asked as calmly as possible.

            “Would you mind if I had a look in your van son?”

            “Go ahead.”

            I leaned back in my seat and listened as Leonard pulled the door of the van open. He let out a small gasp of horror.

            “Son, can you come here please.” Leonard demanded with a shaky voice.

            I unbuckled my seat belt and joined the man.

            “Explain all of this.”

            I stared at him in pure confusion, “What?”

            “What is the meaning of all of this! Why do you have a mattress in the backseat of your car, and a video camera, and a giant teddy bear?”

            “Well it’s exactly what it looks like.”

            “WHAT?”

           

            “Yeah. I just picked up this mattress from my cousin’s friend because he was moving and didn’t want it any more. I figured I’d get rid of it for him since I’m the only one with a car big enough to transport it.”

            “How about the bear?”

            “It’s for my Aunt Janet. Today is her birthday and she loves bears so I got her a giant teddy.”

            Leonard stared at me in thought and had a look of annoyance on his face.

            “Then what about the video camera?”

            “I’m in charge of making a dvd for their home movie collection. I decided to buy a new camera because my Uncle’s is still doing VHS and I heard HD is a lot better.”

            “How about that shovel?”

            “I keep it for emergencies.”

            “Emergencies?”

            “Yeah, if I hit an animal I don’t like to just leave it in the middle of the road so I drag it off and burry it.”

            Leonard raised an eyebrow.

            “You burry it?”

            I scoffed.  “Wouldn’t you want to be buried instead of left in the middle of the road I mean honestly?”

            Leonard ignored my question and asked another.

            “What about the chain and the duct tape.”

            “If I ever need to be towed out of a ditch I have the rope, and if a piece of my car falls off I have duct tape. Didn’t you see my bumper?”

            Leonard examined the bumper that was being held up by a large quantity of the tape and turned to me. He stared for a few minutes and then closed the door of the van.

            “Alright smart guy, explain this.” He pointed at the sign. I rolled my eyes and stared at the man.

            “Sir seriously? If you saw that wouldn’t you want it?”

            Leonard continued to stare. Anger and annoyance was written all over his face.

            “BUT YOU ARE SITTING OUTSIDE OF THE PARK!”

            “Sir,” I paused to add a little bit of a dramatic affect, and because I couldn’t believe this man was so stupid, “I’ve been stuck in traffic.”

            Silence stretched between us. I don’t understand what the big deal would have been anyway.

            “But the bed, and the bear, and the camera and the candy,”

            “Candy is delicious sir. Would you like some? I think I have a piece of taffy you can have. Just don’t take the candy corn, those are my favorite!” I reached into the passenger side window and pulled out the bag, offering it to him.

            “NO!” He let out a cough and calmed himself. “No I don’t want any candy. Just get out of here.”

            “Thanks. See ya later sir,” I called and jumped into the drivers seat. Safely I merged into traffic and slowly inched my way home.

Thinning the Herd: Bathroom Scene

INT. ROSE’S BATHROOM - NIGHT

Rose relaxes in a bubble bath. The room is very steamy and she sighs in content. F, an anthropomorphic wolf suit appears sitting across from her wagging its tail.

F
Hey Rosie, how’ve ya been?
Rose groans in annoyance.
ROSE
What do you want F?
F grins and focuses on her half covered breast.
ROSE (V.O.)
This is F, a figment of my imagination. I’m not entirely sure of it’s gender but it’s been a pain in my ass for years.
F
You know exactly what I want. 

It reaches under the water while a vibrating sound follows the water pulsing. F closes his eyes and begins panting. Rose looks at it with disgust.

ROSE
If you don’t stop I’m calling Q.

Q, a man with long black hair, golden rimmed glasses, jeans and flannel shirt appears and bows. His eyes are closed.

Q
You called.
ROSE
Yes, could you get rid of this thing please? I want to bathe in peace.
Q nods and snaps his fingers. A rope and bone saw appear in his hands as he beckons for him to get out of the tub.
Q
Come you abomination, we have work to do. Let Rose sit in her disappointment and failures in peace.
Rose rolls her eyes and F jumps out of the tub wagging its tail exited.
F
OO, are you going to use the pesticides again.
Q
Only if you are a good figment and leave Rose alone.

An iron door appears behind Q. It is open and inside is an operating table, tie downs, and a flame thrower.

ROSE
Damn it, now my water is cold.